How to Be a Financial Grownup with Personal Finance Pro Bobbi Rebell
Show Snapshot:
Do you want the peace of mind that comes from being a financial grownup? Certified financial planner Bobbi Rebell, author of “How to Be a Financial Grownup,” walks us through why it’s never too late to get your financial house in order. Plus, she offers tips for helping us help our kids become financial grownups too. Bonus, Bobbi shares why she shook up her successful TV career in her mid-forties and how at 50, her career is booming.
In This Episode We Cover:
How Bobbi built an award-winning career wearing multiple career hats. Journalist, TV anchor, author and host of two podcasts, and certified financial planner.
The action Bobbi took in her forties that accelerated her career.
A behind-the-scenes look at what it took for Bobbi to grow her career as a certified financial planner and develop the “Financial Grownup” brand.
Bobbi’s biggest career challenge may surprise you.
How publicly declaring her goal was a key to Bobbi’s success.
Why there’s not a “one size fits all” solution for personal finance.
What the pandemic is teaching us about finances and course-correcting.
Navigating the dual expenses of raising kids and saving for retirement.
Why saying “no” is the first step in raising financial grownups.
How and when to talk to your kids about money.
A speed round of personal finance dos and don’ts to get you in tip-top shape.
Mixed feelings about turning 50? Time to “throw the damn party.”
Quotable:
I looked up and said, ‘I'm really busy, but that's kind of it. I'm just really busy. I'm too busy to enjoy my life. And I came up with a plan to position myself for the next chapter of my life.’
I had things in place when I did leave my corporate job. I did not just walk in one day and quit. I really laid the groundwork for years.
So much has happened in this pandemic that we could never have predicted. We see more than ever how important it is to have a financial backup plan. Not just for us, but for all the people that we care about.
Snackable Smarts:
You can be in your dream job but be too busy to enjoy your life. When Bobbi Rebell was in her forties – she realized she needed to rethink the hectic pace and travel of the TV journalism career that she spent decades building at top news brands.
She shifted her career from on-air reporting of economic and business news to focus on personal finance, write a book and launch the “Financial Grownup” brand, a move that eventually opened new doors and opportunities to partner with brands. Now at 50, Bobbi produces multi-channel financial education content including two podcasts and works on-camera and as a spokesperson for multiple brands.
Preparing for pivots doesn’t happen overnight. Bobbi spent years planning for her move from her big news job. She networked, came up with personal plan, and nailed down the details, including trademarks and her website and book branding – all before leaving her corporate role.
Bobbi credits studying to become a certified financial planner–an arduous and intense four-months of study–for accelerating her successful move into a new career chapter.
Adding key industrial credentials – such as a CFP – can give your credibility for a big, bold career pivot.
Becoming a financial grownup means paying attention to your money.
You have to be your own backstop. You have to know what you have. And have not only a game plan, but also the backup plans. The pandemic has taught us how important it is to have a financial backup plan. Not just for us, but for all the people that we care about.
The pandemic has also taught us that we can make do with less, that the most important thing is to have your friends and your family by your side.
We can rethink retirement. We can ignore all the marketing that encourages us to see retirement in one way. Your retirement doesn't have to be their vision.
Still, you should have as much money as possible in savings. You should absolutely save as much as you can. But you can take the financial pressure off by ignoring the marketing about what retirement is supposed to look like. You don’t even need to retire!
There is no rule of thumb or a baseline for retirement savings. Everyone should save the right amount for them and that lets them have a balance where you don’t have to be “irrationally frugal.”
Balancing saving for retirement and funding your children's needs is a challenge, but it’s critical to keep in mind you can’t finance retirement. To avoid becoming dependent on your children, you need to say no to them when they're young adults. You need to prioritize saving for your retirement.
Parents give so much to their children, and while you will be there in an emergency situation, if older kids want to do things like going on a trip with their friends, they can pay for that themselves. Even if they're in still school, kids can find the money. They can get a job and be financially responsible for themselves in many ways. It's okay to say no to your children.
The right age to talk to your kids about money is at any age, as long as you meet the kids where they are. When Bobbi’s son wen to the doctor, she used the visit to talk about meeting health-deductibles. She did a whole lesson on how health insurance works, making it understandable to a twelve-year-old. Rather than give one “big” financial talk, have little financial lessons in the moment, at an age-appropriate level.
Working and having a job is the ultimate financial instructor. You can talk to your kid all you want about taxes, but when they see that first paycheck, they truly understand.
Turning 50? Throw the damn party!
Word of Mouth. Bobbi’s resource recommendation.
“I want people to read the newspaper and consume news in whatever way makes sense for them. It could be watching television. I'm talking about actual news reports, but particularly read newspapers, listen to podcasts and stay informed because a lot does change that affects our finances. And it's important to be on top of that… do the reading and staying informed in whatever medium works.”
Transcript
Katie Fogarty (00:03):
Welcome to A Certain Age, a show for women on life after 50, who are unafraid to age out loud. I'm your host, Katie Fogarty.
When you hear the word "grown-up" what comes to mind? For me, it's taxes 401ks, car payments, mortgages, you know, the fun stuff. Look being 50 is fabulous, but being a grown-up is hard. So, I'm delighted to welcome a guest to the show who makes being a financial grown-up easier.
Bobbi Rebell is an award-winning TV anchor, a certified financial planner. She's the host of two podcasts, Financial Grownup, and Money with Friends, and her book, How to Be a Financial Grownup, is a personal finance playbook with engaging money tales and doable advice from some of the world's most successful people. She is here to walk us through why it's never too late to get your financial house in order and the steps to take after 50 to secure financial freedom. Plus, she has tips for helping us help our kids to become financial grown-ups too. Welcome, Bobbi.
Bobbi Rebell (01:03):
Thank you so much for having me, Katie. I've been looking forward to this interview for quite some time, and I'm so glad we made it happen because I know you are very busy.
Katie (01:11):
You are very busy as well because you wear a lot of hats. In a minute, we're going to dive into the nitty-gritty of personal finance and give me all the advice that I feel that I need. But I want to talk about these career hats. You wear a lot of them: TV anchor, author, host of multiple podcasts, certified financial planner. How did you get here?
Bobbi (01:32):
Well, it was not the plan for sure. It's interesting because I had kind of a tumultuous time in my twenties. I had a brief marriage. I didn't know where my career was going. I just wanted to be exploring things and learning about the world and being a journalist. I became a financial journalist really because my father wanted me to go work on Wall Street and this was the kind of the way to kind of make my dad happy, but also do what I wanted. And he still wants me to do that by the way. But things evolved. And I got remarried in my thirties, had a kid instantly, became a mom of three because I have two step-children that came to live with us. And we raised them here in New York City. And then by my forties, I found myself in my dream job. And then what? Right?
Katie (02:19):
Tell me.
Bobbi (02:20):
So, I was, by that point, I had worked at CNBC. I worked at CNN. I had worked at PBS on the Nightly Business Report and gotten on camera there before 30, which was my goal. And there I was running the U.S. Business video for Reuters, which is the biggest news organization in the world. I was in my early forties. I had a young child; I had these other two kids at home and I kind of looked up and said, I'm really busy, but that's kind of it. I'm just really busy. I'm too busy to enjoy my life.
I came up with a plan basically to position myself for the next chapter of my life. And that had to do with, instead of just reporting the news — I was doing macro news, talking about the economy, interviewing tons of CEOs, traveling a lot, and doing a lot of, frankly, reports about the Fed and corporate earnings and stuff that's not very tangible. And I want it to get down to something that would be more personal for people. And so, I took a deep dive into personal finance. I wrote the book, How to Be a Financial Grownup, which you so graciously told people about. And I had planned to sort of retire from journalism in my forties and just kind of write another book every four or five years and be a full-time mom.
But all these things came my way. And so I've been having a wonderful adventure. I turned 50 last January and I found myself busier than ever. And in so many different areas that, frankly, I did not even really realize existed. So, for example, I wrote this book and I was doing some speaking, but I didn't really love it because I was away from my family. And that was the opposite of what the whole quitting the corporate job was about.
And so I fell into, and I shouldn't say fell into, through all of the networking I've done over the years and contacts I'd kept, I started doing corporate work and now one of my favorite things is to work with brands. So, we were joking, before we started recording that here in my living room because of Coronavirus, we're no longer filming in person. I work for example, with NBC Brand Studio, I've worked with a number of clients. And right now the primary client I work with is JP Morgan Asset Management. And we film this incredible series of 90-minute segments from my living room. And every week I get to interview their thought-leaders about different themes in the market. And it's been amazing. And I work with other brands like Tally, which is a personal finance app that helps people pay down their credit card debt in the most efficient way. I get to do that also from home. I'm doing interviews on local news multiple times per week on behalf of Tally as their spokesperson. And we can do all of this from home, which is incredible. So, I'm on TV more now in my fifties than I ever was.
Katie (05:09):
Out of your living room. Talk about a pandemic pivot…
Bobbi (05:12):
And out of my living room!
Katie (05:13):
Everything that you just shared, I'm going to link to the show notes because I know our readers want to know about it. And I'm going to ask you to take a picture of you in that living room set and I'm going to put it into the show notes too. Because it just shows that you can work, I mean talk about working from home, you are doing it. I want to rewind for a minute because you talked about writing a book, How to Be a Financial Grownup, and your dive into personal finance. You are a CFP. At what age did you go back to school to get that? How did going back to school make a difference in continuing to evolve your career?
Bobbi (05:46):
This is really interesting, Katie. Actually, when I was at CNBC in my twenties my very first job out of college, they offered for free — if it was relevant to your job — courses. So, I went to NYU on Saturdays in my early twenties with a friend and we took a series of six classes towards getting a certificate in financial planning. You could not be a CFP as a journalist at the time. And so, we got this certificate in financial planning and that's what's been on my resume, most of my career. So, I was not a CFP with the logo and officially.
And then, when I was still at Reuters in my early forties, I want to say maybe by then… actually it was, I heard about it while I was at Reuters and I did it afterward. That they were allowing journalists to, if you were of a certain stature, you could apply. And because I'd been doing business-related news, and by then I was writing this personal finance column. It was globally syndicated for Reuters on personal finance issues. They did give me the exemption. And by the time I had written the book, I decided that I wanted independent credibility when I spoke to groups because I wrote the book as a journalist. I interviewed people. I was not the expert. But Katie, what's interesting is when you go out and start speaking to people about a book you've written, people presume that you're the expert. When in fact, I always thought of myself as the journalist asking the experts the questions.
So, I was in this predicament where, how could I answer all these questions if I didn't really have the credibility? So, it was only after the book came out in 2017, the book came out of 2016. In 2017, I went and it was a big debate. Should I go retake the six classes? Because of course, everything had changed since the early nineties. I graduated college in 1992. So, there was no Roth IRA. There was all this stuff that was new. And I took a leap of faith. I was pushed by a few CFP friends of mine that I could do this. And I had of course left my job at Reuters at the time. So, I did not have a full-time job. I carved out four months of my life and I stopped taking speaking gigs, anything. I just said no to everything for four months. And I doubled down and I decided to take this really intense review class. And all I did for four months, Katie was review and frankly, learn everything I needed to pass a test that about half the people fail. So, I had to pass this really, really hard CFP test. And it was a huge investment. It also cost money. And I had to, I treated it like a job. And I was up until midnight many nights. My husband was very frustrated, but I was just taking these...
Katie (08:24):
You're like, "Not tonight, dear. I'm studying!”
Bobbi (08:25):
Yeah, until midnight! I was like, "No, I have to get through another test module." I took it so seriously because I had this reputation, Katie. I had put out this book and how would it look if I failed a personal finance test, right?
Katie (08:37):
Talk about an incentive.
Bobbi (08:39):
So, I really felt intense pressure. I even, when I first decided to take the test, I was emceeing an event. I remember it was called Think Co-op and it's this big event with several thousand people in the audience. And they had wanted me to talk at the beginning about vulnerabilities and taking chances. And so, I announced to them that I was taking this exam and I would report back to them at next year's conference if I passed. So, I really put it out there.
Katie (09:03):
You had an audience of accountability partners, right?
Bobbi (09:06):
Yeah. I mean was really publicly accountable.
Katie (09:09):
That's so smart.
Bobbi (09:10):
I was really terrified. And this test was terrifying. I remember going in, it was like all the airport security, they were taking your fingerprints, pictures. If you wanted to go to the bathroom, everything, you have to reenter all again. You don't get the time back. It was a big thing. They took off all your jewelry, your wedding ring. Everything went into a locker that was like a mile away. It was in this corporate testing center, they had a camera looking down on you with your license facing up. You could only take notes on this piece of paper that they give you, that they then put in your file. So, it was such tight security for this exam. And I remember the questions were so hard and I'd worked so hard. So, this is probably the biggest life accomplishment for me, Katie. And I was on global television.
Katie (09:51):
It sounds like the intensest exam.
Bobbi (09:54):
It was so intense. I cried during the exam, Katie. During the exam, because I was so scared. And then these poor women proctors that were there. They were so sweet. I literally, when I came out and they said I passed; I broke down crying on the floor. And there's no one to tell because you don't have a phone. You don't have jewelry. You have nothing until you check out. So, I'm just hugging these ladies.
Katie (10:16):
This is pre-COVID. I take it. But that is absolutely...
Bobbi (10:20):
Oh way! This is 2017. I mean, I was just in absolute tears.
Katie (10:23):
You were so excited because I mean, talk about throwing your hat over the wall. Setting a goal for yourself, making yourself accountable, going for it. Having that growth mindset and recognizing that even though you had a really awesome career at that point, yet you said to yourself, "I need to keep nurturing it." Which I think is so smart. That makes the difference for people. Is that when they nurture their career, where they invest in themselves, opportunities happen. Have you found that for yourself?
Bobbi (10:49):
I absolutely agree with that. And I also think that while it's certainly more challenging in these times with COVID the other thing that I did for years, even three years before I left Reuters. And I didn't mention that I spent three years working on the book behind the scenes. Not only the book but also the brand Financial Grownups, securing the trademarks, investing in lawyers to make sure everything that I was putting together was protected. Raising, you know figuring out how I was going to finance it because there wasn't money initially coming in. And I had to pay people initially to design the website. I paid for a separate PR firm for promoting the book, but also over the years. And it was hard for my husband to always understand this. I really spent a lot of time, two nights a week, I would allocate to go to something — and I live in New York City, so it's a lot easier because there's a lot of things happening — but to go to events where I might meet people that became true friends, but also people that were in the industries that I wanted to connect with so that I had things in place when I did leave my corporate job. I did not just walk in one day and quit. I really laid the groundwork for years.
Katie (11:53):
Thank you for sharing that; thank you for sharing all the behind-the-scenes work. Because it's so easy to think people are instant successes. Look at their book, look at their award-winning podcast, Bobbi's being quoted on Oprah. But there's so much work that goes into it. And I appreciate you sharing that. All the pre-work that nobody sees. That the overnight success takes, as you shared three years.
I want to talk for a minute about the name of your book and your podcast. Your podcast, Financial Grownup. Your book, How to Be a Financial Grownup. I am a grownup. I turned 51 recently. Right? So, by any measure, I am a grown woman. But if I'm being totally honest with you, I am not sure if I am a financial grownup yet. What do you think makes somebody a financial grownup? Do you have a definition?
Bobbi (12:44):
I think it always changes. But what I'm thinking about now is understanding our vulnerability and the importance of paying attention to your money. And knowing that you ultimately have to be your own backstop and know what you have. And have not only that game plan, but also the backup plans. Because so much has happened in this pandemic that could never have been predicted that we see more than ever how important it is to have a financial backup plan. Not just for us, but for all the people that we care about.
Katie (13:13):
Yes, our kids. I'm joking about not being entirely a financial grownup. I've been muddling through the basics. I know to pay my credit cards, try not to put too much on them. 401ks. Mortgage payments. But for me, the big, "what if" and the unknown is retirement planning. That feels really scary to me because there are so many acronyms involved with everything you need to do. And what retirement looks like right now feels so unclear. The economy is a rollercoaster. What steps can I be taking? What steps can our listeners be taking? You know, tomorrow after listening to the show, that's going to make them more financially secure at 50, 60, 70, and beyond?
Bobbi (13:53):
The first thing to remember is that, although, of course, no one ever said, "Gosh, I have too much money in retirement," you shouldn't beat yourself up. And you should calm down because — and this is actually ironic, it’s crazy that I'm going to quote them — but one of the experts that I interviewed at JP Morgan talks about the theme of course-correcting. That you always want to have more of course for retirement.
But if there's one thing this pandemic taught us, is that you're going to wake up and it's going to be a new day and it's going to be okay. You're going to have pretty much the basics. You may not have the five-bedroom house. Maybe you'll downscale, you'll have a three-bedroom house and that's going to be okay. Or maybe you're going to live a little differently. It's going to be okay. You know, things are always going to hit you that are unexpected. And the most important thing is to have your friends and your family there by your side. So, whatever you do, never get into a panic because you can always course-correct. And we have these things where people told us, "This is how you should want to retire." And we have all marketing coming at us with the sunset and sitting in these beautiful chairs, looking at it with our loved ones. And that's great, but also it's going to be okay. It doesn't have to be their vision. So, don't get caught up in all the marketing. I mean, I look back, we had a huge...I'm Jewish. We had a huge bar mitzvah planned for my son. We've now pushed it back for a year. It was one of those big rah-rah classic New York City parties. And I was like, "Life's short, let's do it."And right now it's on hold. And a lot of the people that are doing these similar parties, or weddings, whatever. You know, they're having a backyard party
Katie (15:26):
Or Zoom. They're doing Zoom bar mitzvahs.
Bobbi (15:28):
Exactly. Or a small family-only backyard thing that's on Zoom. And we have this vision, let's say of the princess wedding that we all maybe want to have, or have for our daughters, whatever it may be. And it's also really sweet and a sign of the times, when you have a really small wedding, and that's what everybody's having. It's more people say that your happiness is tied to basically having the same or more money, slightly more money, than your peer group. And I think there's something to be said for that as much as we don't like to admit it, we just want to be able to do what we want and to do with the people that we care about.
Katie (15:58):
Right.
Bobbi (15:58):
And I think that's where a lot of the financial pressure comes from. That's not to say you shouldn't have as much money as possible in savings. You should absolutely. If your income has not been impacted by the coronavirus, please save more.
Katie (16:11):
Is there a rule of thumb, a percentage that people should be saving? I mean, there's no one size fits all, but is there a baseline that you would recommend?
Bobbi (16:23):
I would not give a baseline because I think everyone should save the right amount for them. And I think there's also a balance. So, some people might say, "Oh, no matter what, when you're young…" What I tell the young people is no matter what, "Save at least as much as your company is going to match." If you work for a company that has a 401k match. So, that’s a good baseline, but ultimately the more you can save at the younger ages, the better. If you don't have money in the bank, well, you should save 70% of you get 80%, but I don't know how they're living. And there's also a balance. I, for example, I'm so happy, I took a trip with my son and my husband. It was only four days long because Iceland is so expensive and I was really hesitant to do it. And my little sister said to me, "You are being irrationally frugal."
Katie (17:06):
I love that. I need to be irrationally frugal.
Bobbi (17:10):
And now, thank God I did that, right? And I only did four days because we wanted to do a top-of-the-line trip. We wanted to do everything we wanted to do in terms of having a private guide. And we went into the volcanoes and stuff. So, that meant a four-day trip instead of a two-week trip. That's fine. Unfortunately, a lot of plans like that are on hold. With Coronavirus, use this opportunity to save up more money because we're not doing those things.
Katie (17:31):
Absolutely. I love the way you talked about course-correcting and that there's no one size fits all solution. Part of the way we should be looking at a retirement is a mindset shift. You know, we don't necessarily need what we've been trained to need by marketing, by the way we're living our lives. I do think that COVID has taught us that we need so many fewer things and expenditures than we thought previously. So, perhaps some of the savings that there's been so much negative to this pandemic, but one of the upsides, if you haven't lost work is you're saving on dry cleaning. You're saving on commuting. I talked to a friend yesterday. He said I haven't put gas in my car in two months. So, there are ways to be saving during this time.
Bobbi (18:15):
Absolutely.
Katie (18:15):
I'm curious. You mentioned having a son; you mentioned having two step-kids. How do we balance saving for our retirement? We're in the 50-plus bracket. How do you balance saving for retirement and funding your children's needs? Because raising kids is expensive. College is expensive. What's your thinking on navigating these priorities?
Bobbi (18:36):
Again, this is not a one size fits all situation. And this is something that I struggle with my husband because you cannot borrow for your retirement. You can borrow for college. So, it has to do with what your own situation is. For us, the balance basically is that we're paying for their college, but then that's it. They can come…my step-daughter moved home after college, and we choose not to charge her rent, but she has to pay for her own expenses. If she wants to have a socially-distanced dinner with her friends, well, that's on her. So, we're not paying her grown-up expenses. She's 23 years old. Now, we choose not to charge her rent. I know some parents feel that people should charge their adult children rent. That's not what we're going to do, but it's just a balance between what is right for you.
But it's the most important thing is that you do not want to be financially dependent on your children. And when you feel that pull, to give them everything and maybe save a little bit less for your own retirement, what I try to say to myself is you never want to be dependent on your children. You never want to make them feel that they have to help you. And if that means saying no to them, when they're young adults, then that's a tough choice, but it's something you may want to consider. And think about it that way.
Katie (19:49):
I totally agree. My mother, when I was young, often said just what you said, "You can't fund your retirement." So they, she explained the choices they were making. Maybe we weren't taking a vacation every year. Maybe it was every three years or paying for…they paid for college, but we paid for our own grad school because they were smart to recognize they didn't want... She said, "We don't want to be a financial burden on you."
How do you have those conversations with your kids? You have somebody who I believe is a middle-schooler and then you have the older kids. Are you transparent with your kids about your income? Are you transparent with your kids about your spending?
Bobbi (20:26):
This is something that we’re in a transitional phase with right now. And what we've come to the conclusion of…So, I just turned 50 in January and my husband's 53. And one thing we decided to do for us, for years we only took vacations basically on points or visiting relatives, because we were raising three children in New York City, which is incredibly expensive. And we now, we made a big decision. We joined a golf club, which turned out to be a great decision because of Coronavirus. And we had a place to go this summer and have some fresh air, which was great. And we're doing this, but at the same time, we're telling this 23-year-old, “Well, you know, you have to pay for your own expenses” and so on. And we have limited budgets for...we have a child in college right now. We said, “This is your allocation for your food budget and other things. You can come to us and ask us for things, but there are limits now, that's it. This is what your budget is because he's living off-campus now.” So, he's not in the cafeteria, in the dorm. And we are not apologizing for the fact that we joined a golf club. We could give them that money and subsidize their lives more, but we're not going to. And that is something that's really important, that it's okay for you to live your life too. And it's hard, but we are not, we don't feel we need to tell them our income. They can look up what our home is worth so they can figure out what the approximate amount that we make. They might know some little things. Sometimes they might overhear what I'm getting for a certain contract with a brand that I'm working with. So, they have little tidbits. They certainly have a sense of things, but I don't feel that you need to explain yourself and your financial decisions to your children.
I think it's really important that you make the decisions that's right for you. And that there be a balance. That it's okay to say, "No, I'm not going to buy you this thing." You can pay for that yourself because we're going to go out to dinner with our friends instead. And we're going to have a fancy meal that we can afford because that's what we want to do. You turn 50 and it has to start being about you. We give so much to our children and of course, we're going to be there in an emergency situation. But you know, if they want to go on a trip with their friends, they can pay for that themselves.
Katie (22:28):
Absolutely.
Bobbi (22:28):
Even if they're in school, they can find the money. They can get a job. They can be a little bit financially responsible for themselves. It's okay to say no to them.
Katie (22:35):
I agree. That's the first step in raising a financial grownup is hearing the word, "no" and recognizing that money is not an unlimited resource. It doesn't grow on trees. And when kids are young, if you haven't taken the steps to say no, or show them that there are limits, how would they know that there aren't unlimited resources? The bank of mom is always open. The bank of dad is always open unless you close that bank. And we've had similar conversations with our daughter, who's a sophomore in college. My husband said something to the effect of, “We're funding your basic needs, but not your lifestyle. So if you,” like you said, “want to be doing the expensive yoga classes, rather than being at the university gym, that's on you. We are certainly paying for your groceries because you're living off-campus, but we're not paying for you to have a $16 glass of wine at the most expensive bar in town. That's on you also.” And so, you know what happens? My daughter is working. She wants to make more money. If we were handing her money, she wouldn't be working. So, I definitely relate to what you were saying about how even if you have the resources to share with your children, by making them more independent, they have to meet their own needs.
So, let's talk about that a little bit. I know you have a book that's coming out that you're working on, that'll be out in the next year about raising financial grownups. You know, what do you wish all parents knew or were doing to get their kids set on the right path? And do you start when they're in elementary school or do you start in high school? So, start with that. What's the right age to be having these conversations?
Bobbi (24:11):
The right age is whatever is appropriate for your child, wherever they are. You have to meet the kids where they are. So, for example, my son had to go to the doctor for something. And I remember it was late in the year, last year. And I said to him, well, at least this happened after we met the deductible for the health insurance. And then I did a whole lesson on explaining how health insurance works to the twelve-year-old. So, I'm a big believer in having little financial lessons in the moment, when it is at an age-appropriate level. I don't believe in just sitting them down and giving them a lesson, but other people do. And it depends on what your child wants. If your child is asking for that, by all means, give it to them. If your child wants an app to learn about finance, by all means, give it to them. So, it's about meeting them where they are and where their interest is.
I also have read a lot of surveys, and this is part of the research for the book, that the best...what really sticks with kids, you can teach them things academically. And this goes back to what you were saying about you putting on restrictions and teaching them that if they want that $16 glass of wine, they have to go earn the money themselves. At the end of the day, real financial lessons are taught when they really face those decisions. So, for example, when my step-daughter was signing up for benefits for her first job, she had the suite, she had worked for a big company, lots of benefits, really great job. I'm so proud of her, but she had the suite of benefits to sign up for. And there's nothing that will teach you about how our healthcare system works, like having to choose healthcare. Right?
Katie (25:37):
Yeah.
Bobbi (25:37):
And so, we walked her through the choices. She ended up choosing a high-deductible plan because her company also, in addition to getting an HSA, they gave her a $750 that goes in the bank account automatically to subsidize it. And she understood intellectually what the deductible was. At the end of the day, when she got that first bill and understood, well, I'm not getting a dime until I spend this much money, whatever the deductible was on the healthcare, there was a scream. A literal scream out loud, very loud one in our home as it really sunk in. Like, wait for a second, "How can my healthcare at this big company,” that's a great company to work for, with great benefits, “How is it that I have to pay for the first X dollars?” It's now a huge number because it's a high deductible plan. And even though they'd given her money, and even though she was taking money out of her paycheck, and even though her deductible, you know, premiums were super-duper low. Certainly, as a twenty-three-year-old, it was still a shock to the system.
So was taxes. I mean, she's spent years, we live in New York City, it’s high taxes. It is terrible. Our taxes are ridiculous. We will probably move for retirement because of taxes. So, when she got her first paycheck and understood, could this be correct? Another scream. So, that's the ultimate financial lesson is them actually becoming grown-ups with a grown-up job. And at the end of the day, there's nothing you can do. You can talk to your kid all you want, about how high taxes are, but when they see that first paycheck, absolutely, no matter what you do. So you got to just wait it out, and be proud of them, that they have that job and reached that level.
Katie (27:12):
We all learn those lessons. And even with younger kids with teenagers, you know, if you hand them $20 to go get a couple of slices of pizza and a Coke after school, they're not paying attention to how much it costs. I think of my daughter at one point, she used to be very into acai bowls. And she did a gap year after high school, she traveled and she mostly lived and worked in Southeast Asia and Africa. And she came home. And literally, when I picked her up at JFK, she said, "Let's go get an acai bowl." And I said, "Okay." And we rolled into her favorite shop and I bought it for her and it was $15. And she looked at me and said, "That's insane, $15 for that acai bowl?!? Do you know how much... That's like a week's worth of spending when I was in Madagascar.” And I was like, "Sweetie, it has been $15 ever since you've been eating it." But it's only when you're in different situations that you're really able to truly understand the value of money. And if parents are handling it all, they are not...
Bobbi (28:08):
That's not happening...
Katie (28:10):
Bobbi, I want to switch gears for a minute. Because you mentioned earlier that you're 50. And I love that you said that out loud because we are all about owning your age and aging out loud. But you work in TV, right, which is not always the most age-friendly industry. How do you feel about being 50? What does it mean to be a 50-year-old woman in your industry? And did you embrace this? Did you celebrate it? Tell me everything.
Bobbi (28:35):
I had not really planned to. Really, I had planned to retire in my mid-forties when I wrote this book. That was the plan. That I would be an author and not really be on camera. And I was done having almost, it has to do with your age because I'd been doing it for 20, more than 20 years. But I was also just kind of tired of doing editorial news. And so frankly, what happened is, I just, through all of this networking that I'd done over the years, I got a call and I ended up connecting with NBC brand studio and some other brands that I've worked with and conferences. And look, I don't, I've never hidden my age. It’s on my LinkedIn. You can see when I graduated from college, so someone could easily do the math, but I just started getting these other jobs that happened to be on camera or on stage. And so life has just happened.
I did face a big decision. So, people, I don't hide my age, it doesn't say on my LinkedIn, 50 or whatever, it didn't say 48. But as I said, it's not hidden in any way that said I did face a decision recently because we did decide to have a 50th birthday party. And the way it came about was, I was not happy about turning 50. I didn't know what to do, right. And I kind of thought maybe I should just go to a spa with my sister. I turned 50 in January. So, this planning was happening in the fall. My husband who I had thrown a 40th birthday party for a surprise 40th birthday party for him obviously 13 years ago. Now he wants to throw me kind of a big party because I'd never had a big party for me. I had a wedding. But I never had a big party for me. And I had said, "No, no, no, no, no." All this time. He had gone and reserved the party room in our building, but I had said, "No, no, no, no, no." And I had thought, well, maybe I'll just do something quiet. Maybe I'll just go into the woods and cry. I don't know. And I was on this walk with my friend, Caroline in Central Park, which is something, pre-Coronavirus, that I did a lot with my friends. We would go for walks in Central Park rather than go sit and eat. Highly recommended, so much more fun and obviously healthier. And we were getting towards the end of the walk. And I asked her what she thought I should do. I said I want to just kind of go cry in the woods for a day...
Katie (30:46):
…the woods of Central Park...
Bobbi (30:48):
And she looked at me and she took, she kind of grabbed my arms and shook me and looked me in the eye. You know, this is of course pre-Coronavirus, so we could do that. And she said, “Bobbi. You're healthy. You're happily married. You have the resources to do this. Your husband wants to throw you a party. Have the damn party.”
Katie (31:07):
Everybody needs a friend like Caroline.
Bobbi (31:11):
I know. So, I came home to my husband. I told him, I said, “Okay, fine.” This was only, I think five weeks before, I said, "Fine. Let's have the party." And I had someone that I worked with at JP Morgan who did party planning on the side, and I had her put it together. In just five weeks, which was a little bit crazy, five or six weeks. And we did it in the party room, which we had reserved, but it's really, it's really nice party room. And the outside was open that January 11th was 65 degrees out.
Katie (31:40):
Nice.
Bobbi (31:40):
And we had an old Hollywood theme. So, it was like, you know, it was sort of like embracing the sort of the glamorous age of the 20s. And we had, you know, all these themed drinks that were very fun. And you know, it was a big party. There were like three or four bartenders and passed hors d'oeuvres and a whole buffet and music. And there were screens with all these old Hollywood movies. And we had old Hollywood-themed like, lollipops, cake pops. It was a really big fun party. And I was so glad that photographer so glad that we had this party because who knew it would be the last party?
Katie (32:18):
It was probably everyone's last party. And I love that you celebrated, that you embraced this moment. I think turning 50 is a huge milestone. And to sort of throw your arms around it, or to have Caroline grab your arms, and shake you and say, "Throw the damn party." It's amazing advice.
Bobbi, we're nearing the end of our time together. And you've shared some... I could talk to you all day long as I need to know so much. I need to know about finance. There's so much I need to know about, what I'm doing well, maybe what I'm not doing at all. I would love if we could just do a very quick speed round, where you drop some quick wisdom on us, either say "yes, no" - thumbs up, thumbs down to this list of things I'm curious about. Are you up for it?
Bobbi (33:00):
Yes.
Katie (33:00):
Good. All right. Let's do it. Okay. So, yes, no: automating deposits to your retirement accounts.
Bobbi (33:08):
Yes.
Katie (33:09):
Okay. Good. Early withdrawals?
Bobbi (33:11):
Wait, I need to add something.
Katie (33:14):
Yes. Go.
Bobbi (33:15):
You can automate that there's an increase in incremental periods. So, you can set it up with your employer, that it goes up by 1% every year or whatever time interval you want. So, not only automate them but automate increases.
Katie (33:30):
Ooh, I love that. I'm taking that on. Okay. Early withdrawals from retirement accounts?
Bobbi (33:35):
No.
Katie (33:36):
No. Okay. Charging adult children at home rent?
Bobbi (33:42):
No, no. For me, no.
Katie (33:43):
For you no. Okay. Working with a CFP?
Bobbi (33:47):
Yes.
Katie (33:48):
Using budgeting apps?
Bobbi (33:50):
Yes.
Katie (33:51):
Okay. Any, any particular app that you recommend? I know you work with Tally. Is, is that good for everyone or is that for younger people? Is it...
Bobbi (33:59):
I do recommend Tally. That is for managing your credit card payments so that you don't miss any late payments and you pay the lowest possible rates. So, I do recommend Tally for that.
Katie (34:07):
Terrific. Okay. Telling your children how much money you make?
Bobbi (34:12):
Personal decision. I don't.
Katie (34:14):
Good answer. Renting versus owning?
Bobbi (34:16):
Owning.
Katie (34:16):
Paying your kid's college tuition.
Bobbi (34:22):
If you can, yes. It's the ultimate gift to have them graduate debt-free.
Katie (34:27):
I love it. Asking your parents about their retirement, financial planning.
Bobbi (34:32):
Yes.
Katie (34:33):
Retiring at all. Do we get to retire?
Bobbi (34:39):
Personal decision.
Katie (34:39):
I love it.
Bobbi (34:40):
It depends. How do you define retiring though? I mean, what are you going to do? If what you enjoy is your work. Why stop on principle that goes to marketing that we talked about earlier. There's a lot of marketing that tells you, you should stop working at a certain time and then sit on a beach and look out at the sunset. If that's what you want to do, that's fine. But if you have a job that you enjoy doing and you are healthy and can do it, why not keep doing it? If that's what you want to do.
Katie (35:07):
A hundred percent, a hundred percent. There's so much vibrancy in this next chapter. If you're enjoying it, just keep on going.
Bobbi, you’ve shared so many wonderful tips and tools during our time today. Is there a particular product or resource you want to make sure our listeners know about before we wrap up?
Bobbi (35:24):
I want people to read the newspaper and consume the news in whatever way that makes sense for them. It could be watching television. And I'm not necessarily talking about the cable stations where people were yelling at each other. I'm talking about actual news reports, but particularly read newspapers, listen to podcasts and stay informed because a lot does change that affects our finances. And it's important to be on top of that.
You asked me about withdrawals. Well, the truth is, if you are in a hardship position, you can withdraw from your retirement accounts, but you should know what that involves and what the consequences are. And that all has to do with reading and staying informed in whatever medium works.
Katie (36:00):
That's such smart advice. And I would encourage all listeners to head to Bobbi's website. Because when you sign up for her newsletter, you get this wonderful free download. It's “25 Financial Grownup Tips” from a whole host of interesting people. And half of them were things I never would have thought of. It's easy, it's free, it's smart. It'll make a difference.
Bobbi, how can our listeners keep following you and all your money tips and learn more about your book and your two podcasts?
Bobbi (36:28):
Thank you so much. Well, yes, my website is the center of all the things. So, you can go to my website, get your free list of 25 everyday money tips from our all-star financial grownups. Get on my newsletter, but please absolutely subscribe to my podcasts Financial Grownup and Money with Friends. They're both really informative. Financial Grownup, we speak with high-achieving people and they tell money stories of when they became financial grownups and share everyday money tips. And then Money with Friends, we have an amazing rotating cast of thought leaders. We discuss topical things on personal finance. So, that's a great resource. If you do want to stay on top of the news, we take the news that's relevant in the personal finance space, we discuss it this season, our guest co-hosts include David Bach who wrote The Automatic Millionaire. You might know him for his whole Latte Factor Theory. We also have Farnoosh Torabi as a co-host. Just amazing people. Grant Sabatier is known as a financial retirement early expert. So many great people that we have in the cast this year. So, please definitely check out Money with Friends.
Katie (37:35):
What an incredible roster. Thank you, Bobbi.
This wraps A Certain Age, a show for women over 50, who are aging without apology. Thanks for listening. Please help us grow by heading to Apple podcast, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts to subscribe, rate, and leave a review and visit us at acertainagepod.com for show notes and bonus content. Special thanks to Michael Mancini Productions, who composed and produced our theme music. See you next time. And until then: age boldly beauties.